Rabu, 09 Maret 2011

Why Write?

This is an assignment that I wrote at the end of last semester for my English class. Although it's school-related, I'm somehow in love with it! It explains why I write, and the odd complexities of how my mind works, with just the slightest bit of sarcastic wit. Well, maybe that's an understatement... Enjoy!

Writing is a chore. Writing is a hobby. Writing is a blessing. Writing is annoying. Writing is enjoyable. Writing is thought provoking. Writing is thoughtless. Writing is the greatest form of self-expression I have ever encountered. It’s different for everyone, but I do not know how I would ever live without it.

I write what I’m feeling, I write what I’m thinking, I write who about I am, and I write about who I want to be. I do not write enough. I can count the times I’ve been to this class on one hand. I’m lazy, and unmotivated. But yet, I’m passionate. Because as soon as I pick up a pen and paper, or in this case, sit down in front of my laptop, I am unstoppable. I escape the world and enter into my own, created only by the words I combine into sentences, paragraphs, poems, and pages… thousands of pages, if I had the time.

I write to get away from the pressures of everyday life. The world is stressful and unbearable at times. But being able to write about it, like in our daily journals, we get all that stress out on paper. Every last thing we’re feeling. Or, at least, everything we can write in ten minutes. The world of writing is exaggerated. We can take the anger we feel towards parents who are critical over their child going to fashion school when they could “do so much more with their lives”, towards friends who end up drunk at throw up on our new shoes (again!), towards our bosses who do not understand that studying for midterms is more important than serving coffee, and towards boyfriends who annoy us to death, although we still love them…. We can bring those feelings onto paper, and instead of performing psychology and self-analysis on ourselves, we can go crazy. We can exaggerate every word said, and put a false twist on every encounter, and create lies that we tell our selves. We can be untruthful and irrational. And then, a week later, when all of the feelings we deemed as major only one week prior are now nonexistent, old news, we can look back, and simply laugh.

By getting our feelings out on paper, it is easier to move on. Some people believe that talking out your problems will solve them. I never understood this. If I’m having a problem, why in the world would I ever want to tell anyone about it? Why would I want to shatter the picture perfect image of myself? I wouldn’t. I would much prefer to write it out… then I am the only one in on the secret of how screwed up I really am, as well as everyone reading this essay, of course.

In addition to anger and stress, I write about my ideas and thoughts, and my nauseatingly high degree of happiness about my life. I write about my plans; I am a compulsive planner, how can I NOT have record of it? I am also a dreamer. And a harsh realist as well. I am misunderstood, but I completely understand my own thoughts when I read them.

I remember the first essay we wrote for this class. A memory piece. I chose my method of choosing which college I would go to. Not exactly thrilling. But my writing came to life as I detailed the stress I felt during those months. And now, looking back, I laugh. How could I have ever considered being a business major? That’s much too dry for me. Or, what about when I wanted to become a journalist? (Actually, this is exactly what I want now, but a FASHION Journalist!) I believe I outlined that in my daily journal as well. I cannot imagine myself writing about the next presidential candidate, or about whatever war we’re in these days. I am a ridiculous person, who seriously, seriously lacks a high degree of common sense. But I love being able to read about it. I love going back into that exact moment where I came up with every crazy idea, and remembering how passionate I once was about it.

I write for so many reasons. I write to get my feelings out. I write to understand myself. I write to express my thoughts. I write to explain my ideas. I write to make people laugh, most notably myself. I write for ME. :)

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